surreal life needs a surreal experience

I know I am not the only one.
I know you, especially you who are over 30 or are leaning close to it, and have lived in several different places throughout your life time have had the same experience as I did, and still do.
Maybe you, all of you, we feel the same.

Life is surreal

More and more I feel like my life is screened in front of me, very closely whilst detached. I am a mere spectator without any power to intervene.

No, it does not mean that I am invisible and feel non-existent in this world, which may or may not really exist.
It means that life does not feel real, life lost its weight its tangible feeling.

Life becomes ever so precarious and frivolous while all things that were thought to be constant looses its grounds.
More and more I feel I need to test each and every rule and principle that was taught to me in my preparation for the role as a part of the mass army of proper citizens.

I can only relate to those who are crazy who have gave up on making sense of it all. They are the only people who are real while the others play a role. They are actually the only sane people in this insane circus of life. The others, who are trying hard to live the normal life are the real loonies of this universe.
Like wise, only experiences that are surreal seem real, while as the normal daily routines seem like mere pictures whizzed in front of my face.

I became more and more appreciative of surrealists art, acts and their thoughts and feel these are the people that I can truly relate to. Those that have had the same sensation.

.......
I know I started writing this for a specific reason to get to a point but forgot... as I always to with my absent mind. My life is so surreal that even my brain has left it.

found it

Many people say that you really find yourself around the ages of 30 or so. That when you are in your twenties you are still unsure of who you are, and your true identity. You go through the whole process of trying this and that and around 30 you find it. You. Also around that time you find your partner. True most people actually find them around the ages of 25 to 30, but well I guess when you find yourself, it is easier to find the person, the style of person you want to be with.

Style wise I found it. Ofcourse this does not mean that I will stick to this for the rest of my life nor that this is the ONLY style I will stick to, but well let's just say this will be my 30s style. And it is.... drum roll please~~~

Acid Jazz. - a London based movement of music - which combines jazz with soul, funk and disco beats, and includes electronic compositions.

I have grown out of my hip hop RnB trousers and now need to get into my new love for Soul/funk flava jazz.. what is called Acid Jazz.

And due to this, or maybe it was the other way around, I am now searching for someone who will fit this style which can be seen in this music video of Jay Kay of Jamiroquai.


okay, I don't know how as a woman you are supposed to dress accordingly. BUT if you find someone like this- Jay Kay that is and no not the characteristics but mostly the looks or the taste in music- please send them to me. Thank you.

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Scrap that. Its not Jay Kay, no .. he's to main stream for me.
Its more Gilles Peterson or Ben Westbeech...ish Acid Jazz fellows

Seriously Ben Westbeech's song is to die for and Gilles Peterson is the guru of acid jazz... so I say.